Tuesday, April 7, 2009

IF SHE DOES MESS WITH YOU, HIT HER UP STYLE


-To a chic who plagiarizes your creativity

Carol Radull, Carol Mutuko....Carol, Carol, Carol…Does one’s name have an effect on their character? Absolutely yes! In the Carol case for instance, they are extremely super mouths…and what’s more worse is when you react whenever you’re dissolved in such a name.

In her personality, I see many like her; in her physique, the many disadvantaged ones who opt for a sexy back diet which leaves them heavier than before; and in her baggy mouth, the great wall to hide her inadequacies and to meekly unravel the non-existent self-confidence.

The whole of her just sends one message: I’ll be the next big thing in the radio industry i.e. (Wambo), ‘my idol, my role-model and my mentor’. A truly jealous woman who can’t stand see the man she so wished would one day pop out the big question for her dump her on the campus ground and run after the beautiful hands of another Carol who is much saner and prettier.

What’s more; her plump cellulitic and stretch-marked body can’t get her the worst internship there can be in any media outlet sembuse a job offer?

Fortunately, her mouth gives her some little self-esteem and at other times, over-confidence. Swaggering her piggy figure everywhere and everyone thinks that the campus she reps. Is so full of overweight Chiquittas. Oh, and I almost forgot mentioning her dire need for glasses-fat is over sagging hence doing away with her eyelids (making her look like one of those middle east atomic bomb victims of the world war 2).

- From a girl who doesn’t sit around and let shit stomp on her.

Psalms 129

A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,

"Father, remember Psalm 129?"

The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said,

"Father, remember Psalm 129?"

The priest apologised "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."

Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said,

"Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."

Moral of the story:
If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

Singles and lonesome


“If you love, you’ll suffer; but if you don’t love, then you don’t know the true meaning of God’s teachings.”
Says Agatha Christie. And God emphasizes;

Faith, hope and love?
Love’s the greatest.

Here I am wondering how many students know an iota of an idea about ‘love’. Maybe just but a few (mostly torn in between love, lust and the need for company).

Love’s the greatest. That’s why artistes always sing about it. From Backstreet’s ‘show mw the meaning of being lonely’ to George Michael’s ‘I wanna know what love is’ and later on; ‘Now that we have found love what are we to do with it?’

This is the consolation many partake on love; it’s not necessary-juju can work better. Or that girls and ladies are here to ‘look at, admire, keep your heart alert, or to ogle at!’ A student once confessed to me. Unlikely, we may talk and talk and talk but, eyes never compliment what the lips say.

A fact that is to remain for sure is that if you so old i.e. campus-wise, from mid 3rd year to late 4th year; it’s a pity to be consoling yourself. Being in such a class means one thing, you’re totally thick when it comes to creativity, imagination, social life, team work, etc.

That’s why this year especially that Valentines already came and left many worse hit than ever before, they should search for cupid allover as it’s the only change they so much need. No more ogling, hanging out at the singles corners or drowning yourself into loneliness. If neither of this works, don’t miss a chance in the ‘matched friends for convenience’ even if it’s for a weekend/day-it way end up to be long lasting.

By Mary J. Njoki

Friday, April 3, 2009

FINAL


This should be my last

Been writing to you

How I feel

What I desire

Why I’d die for it

Because I love you

Done my all

Given my most

Been there for you

Loving you

Not loving me

Been hurt

Broken my heart

Shunned my love

Unloved me

There’s time

Can be change

I’m hoping

May be not

May be yes

But I’m done.

Kenyan Blogs Webring Member

Thursday, March 19, 2009

My erstwhile
This may seem hard, still simple

Reason I say bye
You said so first
Reason I leave
You left me first
Reason I love no more
You loved no more
Coz love is reciprocal
I noticed you the day you noticed me
Dreamt of you as you dreamt of me
Talked about you…ditto
Thought of you…
Desired you…

Today you chose to ignore
Dream of another like I am
Talk of the ‘new’ like you do
Think of him
Desire of him

It’s called
Reciprocal loving
Be happy if she is still running after your ATM

My mom tells me that whenever I beep my Dad’s phone, he starts cursing.
“More money, does she think that we are in a mafia or what?”
He then tells her,
“We won’t call her back nor will she be getting more cash…at least until she learns.”
But no way I’m I going to be broke when my parents are alive and around. I know what he thinks, ‘the more money she gets, the higher the chances she will have to do drugs.’
“She takes after either of us, I never did that nor did you?” My mom asks my Dad.
If they don’t give me cash, I’ll definitely get it from somewhere else. Parents should appreciate when their daughters’ nag them about money since, you’ll rest assured that she prefers your meager cash you give her. If you stop, she’ll start getting it from somewhere else-and a THICK parent will take it as a belief that she finally learning to survive on the little you send her.
One thing for sure is that nothing is for free. She may end up getting money from another outlet in exchange. To be a whore or a call girl doesn’t mean you operate from a brothel…there are other new places.
Back are the days when money was a taboo for kids. When is the right time to introduce money to kids? At class five I had thought that I would have the freedom being in a boarding school but alas, my pocket money was kept by the teacher, I would buy stuff through him; my transport back home was paid to the driver and the rest transferred to the next semester. High school was almost the same as you would withdraw a certain amount weekly.
Isn’t it funny when we become mean to girls out of fear that they may start doing drugs, buy contraceptives or carry out an abortion? What’s money anyway, the root of all evil?
MALE EGO
Just think of their masculinity-the STRONGER sex. That must have a term used long long ago coz the 21st century’s man needs extreme Upgrading; he seems to be deteriorating day by day!
I long for the days when men were real: When they headed the political, economical and social seats. They would stomp on ladies like shit. They would make laws more so for women though not for a mere second had they had had a sexual transformation. The only thing they appreciated in chics was portrayed through their paying of dowry. However, they would perceive that as a way of buying some possession, like the way one buys flour, cook it and later shit it out. What dignity was in a woman when she would be owned before she reached her sweet teenage years?
All this was going on since the days of the early man (not Adam). Adam was in his own special class. That’s why he didn’t have a Eve and Eva for a wife but one good Eve. A confused man came later on…and a THICK one now.
The man living in this century needs divine intervention. This is a century every lady out there WANTS a man to survive but doesn’t NEED him. She’s up there, head to head with men lucky enough to reach there as he is no longer in control.
How many are singles when our grandpas’ had wives by their age? They have not a single clue on how to make a move on any lady, pave a way to a woman…

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

baloons vs boiled bananas

Little thing wants to know what's for dinner
Boiled bananas?
Not again!

She can't yet understand
Why ma' buys baloons and not good food
Yet she aint allowed to play with them

They aren't baloons...
How can I tell her?
They too are importanr

Without baloons
Daddy will kill ma'
And nobody will boil bananas for her